Last Update - Jun 16, 2009

There is little that can accurately be said about the black life and horrible death of David F. Kuhl. Most of those who truly knew him were remanded to the care of federal institutions of mental health shortly after his death, with the two notable exceptions of his wife and daughter. In the case of the former, her testimony is simply not credible and cannot be taken seriously. His daughter on the other hand, while respected by her associates and politically vocal, maintains an iron silence on the topic of her father. Her only recorded statement regarding him occurred when she received news of his death, to which she was quoted saying, "Well, it's a start."

In light of this, and with consideration to the haze of rumor and hearsay that surrounded his life, it is important to stick to the facts, few though they be. Reliably then, we can say only the following:

Firstly we must dismiss the rumor that David was a member of the Ordo Temple Ordis. This is simply untrue. Nor was he ever a member of the Brotherhood of The Golden Dawn or even the Society of Masons. He was not born during an eclipse nor did he have any extra digits or organs. His dog's name was not Satan, and while the beast was noted to have a vile disposition it has never been shown to be responsible for anyone's death, certainly no children.

He was not, as has been claimed, present at the Tunguska Blast of 1908, in fact reliable testimony places him in Moldova at this time. Claims to the effect that he could have traveled between the two points in the time frame given simply cannot be taken seriously, no matter what Mr. Tesla says.

Numerous students of European history have questioned his role in the notorious Schleswig-Holstein affair, but no conclusive statements have yet been given. All parties involved furiously deny that human sacrifice was involved but refuse to elaborate on the role played by Kuhl, referring to him only as Herr Vardlokkur.

It is also untrue that he possessed a copy of the Necronomicon of Abdul Alhazred. Kuhl himself staunchly denied this during his life. That his claim was ignored by some can be explained by his reputation and by his frequent caveat that he did in fact possess a copy of "The King In Yellow". Of course neither of these works was found within his estate following his death.

As to his death, it has perhaps been one of the greatest sources of controversy. The exact cause of his demise has never been determined but is listed under the vague rubrick of "spontaneous human combustion". Coroner's reports claim the damage to his body was consistent with an electrical fire, however this is difficult to explain as the cellar in which his remains were found contained neither wiring nor generator. Some have suggested lightning as a possible cause, yet again a lightning strike in a cellar is hard to support. Those explanations which seek to connect his death to the chalk pentagram in which his body was found are to be considered nothing more than superstitious and malicious rumor and in extremely poor taste.